Today, we have a very special update. I'm here to give you the dirt, the inside scoop, the real truth about what its like to live in the communist, socialist, anti-american nightmare that is....*dun dun dun*....nationalized health care.
It has reached my ears on these distant shores that republican obstructianism and the enormous fail that is the democratic congress have, through the considerable efforts and profound dickishness of one Joe Lieberman of Conneticut, come together to kill the public option. Heroes of heroes.
Gather round, friends, and let me tell of the horrors which they have saved us from.
The other day I went to the hospital here in Korea. (Nothing to worry about. I'm perfectly fine. Just a small cold that wouldnt go away.) I took the bus, which costs aproximately 80 cents, to the closest hospital with something resembling an english clininc.
Even though I am an ignorant foreigner with almost no command of the language, several people kindly assisted me. On my way to see the english speaking doctor, I had to sign in at the desk and pay the cashier 7,300 won upfront. To save you some time, 7,00o won is roughly equal to $7 (USD).
Yep, thats right. I walked into a hospital for 8 dollars. I was seen within 40 minutes. It would have taken less time had I not needed someone to walk me around by the hand and translate all the forms for me.
It takes me longer than that to see my personal doctor in new york city AND it costs me at least 5 times more. But I digress.
Later that day, I went to the pharmacy to fill the undecipherable list of pills the doctor had ordered for me. When they realized how poor my korean is, they found the employee with the best english to explain to me what, exactly, i would be taken. (I wish immigrants-- legal and otherwise-- might recieve such curteous treatment in the united states. it speaks badly about our national character that they do not.)
When they rang me up, I almost laughed. 5 kinds of pills and a special gargle all came to a whopping total of 3,200 won. Which is, roughtly 3 US dollars.
I got all the medication I needed for less than the cost of a McDonald's Happy Meal.
I got to thinking, once the haze of cold medication wore off. Wouldn't it be nice if we could all go to the doctor when we needed it, without worrying more about the cost of the bill than our own health. Wouldn't it be amazing if we could all get the medicines we need? Would it really be so bad for the government to step in now and again, if it meant that we might be able to afford all the incredible drugs that this country has managed to produce?
And that, folks, is the real nightmare of national health care. That once we have it, we will like it. We won't ever want to give it up. Insurance companies claim they cannot compete with government health care. They also seem to claim that government cannot provide health care effectively. Well, the truth is that they can, and I have seen it. I dare any insurance company, lobbyist, republican or "blue dog" democrat to find me healthcare so affordable. And i triple dog dare Joe Lieberman to tell me how the hell America's "superior healthcare" does any good for the large numbers of us who simply cannot afford it. I'm sure Luis Vuitton makes a superior handbag but I sure as hell can't afford one. I'll take a solid Target knock off, and be glad to have it. Healthcare for all-- it may not be glamorous or to the taste of certain CEOS, but it might just get the job done anyway. The rich, I'm sure, can still find someone to sell them their designer healthcare plans.
The time for a public option is here, and I have some strong words for anyone who lets it die.
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